Man, are all men ass holes! I mean come on...I had a great time with this Prince Charming- if you even want to call him that. We danced, we laughed, and he whispered sweet nothings to me all night. I really thought that this was going somewhere. I’m really not that type of girl-- I swear, but my feelings got the best of me and yeah we hooked up (turns away shamelessly). Yup, I'm a tramp. I fell for the first guy that I met on a Saturday night.
I don’t know what happened, but by twelve o’clock things were getting really hot and we ended up at my place because I knew my sisters and step mother were going to be out of town and I had the house all to myself. But what went wrong??? I kept telling him that I usually don’t do this but he said neither did he. Those kisses—I mean those kisses really did shut me up. I mean the feelings and what we wanted to do were both totally mutual but I never thought that a guy like that would do me wrong like this! He’s a Prince for God’s sake…I thought at least he knew how to treat a lady. I mean he's established, lives with his parents for the time being but I'm sure he can manage a kingdom on his own.
He was totally amazing; it was like he was in my mind! He knew what to do, what to grab and how to kiss but not jabbing his tongue down my throat. It wasn’t like a wham bam thank you ma’am. It was more like pure love making. Don’t get me wrong, just because I’m cleaning soot all day and in a house full of ladies doesn’t mean I was in heat or anything (I didn’t need to get laid but it happened)…it’s just that I was falling for him and it all happened so fast.
Anyways I’m in a panic. After that amazing night of pure orgasmic heaven, I woke up and he wasn’t there. He left. He didn’t even bother to leave a letter. At least give me your number or where I can reach you….SERIOUSLY???? The last time this happened to my friend Tinker Bell her boy Peter fell for another tramp named Wendy. But that was in Never Never Land and this is a Fairytale and for once it should happen my way!
It’s been a few weeks now. I kept calling and sending him letters…but still no answer. I don’t know what to do. I just feel so used and abused. Why hasn’t he called me? Is he thinking of me? Was I at least good? Oh fairy God Mother…what shall I do! As long as I don't get knocked up. Oh snap, it's been.... (flips to her calendar and counts the days) a week now. I think I'm late.
::Runs to the CVS Pharmacy and buys a pregnancy test::
Cinderella faints when she see's the two lines. The End.
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